Hypothyroidism has the power to affect our lives so completely.
Written by Robyn Guidon
It was January 20. My boyfriend and I had been living long distance while we waited for his company to transfer him. We were planning a life and trying to have children and I knew he was the one for me. We were on the phone and he had just let me know that he didn’t get the transfer we’d been hoping for. I was starting to comfort him when I heard “…and I was relieved…”
My gut dropped.
During the weeks that passed like molasses he asked for space. He got angry. He had previously asked me to move home but realized that’s not what he wanted either. I heard everything from the trying to hurt me “I don’t love you” (he absolutely did) to “I don’t want to slip back into old patterns” (I can’t blame him) to the absolutely soul crushing “I haven’t felt loved in a very long time”.
Crap. Yup. There it was. And the saddest part was that I knew it…
We were in a place that certainly wasn’t okay and from the moment the ball dropped, I’ve let him know that I respected his decision. He’s always led us to be our best and I was not showing up as that person for him or for me.
Though I’ve heard many things through this time, we’ve settled on the fact that he needs to be alone and do things his way. I know in my heart of hearts that there’s truth to that, so through our breakup I have loved him and honoured him and his wishes and we’ve remained as fair as we could be.
But, also in my heart of hearts, I know that if I was showing up as the person he had met and fell in love with, we wouldn’t be in this spot in the first place.
And that’s where my story begins…
The other day I was flipping through pictures on our computer, being nostalgic and letting myself have a good cry.
Things were incredible.
Unlike anything I had ever experienced.
Our first dates were romantic and epic:
A bucket list northern lights experience on our very first date. Our second, a 4 day trip that included my first time ever seeing Niagara Falls by opening the grand curtains from our Falls View Suite (I cried at the sight), then, a weekend in the world renowned Jasper Alberta, followed by 10 days in a car traveling all through the Maritimes, always stopping to golf at some of the best courses in the Country.
Then came pictures of our life and home together, adopting our pets, and more travels.
Glimpses of our daily life that I had been missing for the last 5 months we’d been apart flicked in front of my eyes.
And then there it was.
A screen shot of a text I received many moons ago.
I wasn’t expecting it.
I don’t even know why it was there….
The text simply said:
You’re so easy to love. I’m a lucky man.
It hit me hard.
As recently I have been very not easy to love…
I’m not sure where it all started but somewhere along the last year or two I became someone I couldn’t recognize.
A few years ago I started to gain weight and feel lethargic.
C’s brother would call me “high energy” and we’d look at each other like he was crazy; that was certainly not how we’d describe me anymore.
I started getting snappy, my sex drive disappeared and I felt impatient about life.
In September 2012 I experienced 3 large losses and after the stress of it all I was no longer just ‘moody’, I felt angry a lot.
At life.
At him.
At work.
At where we lived.
And anyone who’s been angry, or with an angry person, knows that it rips through your life like wildfire.
I had no idea where it was coming from. Things that would normally never bother me would make me fly off the handle. Like, really stupid stuff:
He wouldn’t turn off his alarm quickly enough in the morning.
Pending client calls or appointments.
Driving in a town with no traffic.
Even chopping veggies for dinner made me angry – and I’m a health coach and truly believe in the miracle of great and healthy food!
He drew the line on numerous occasions and let me know that he would not be with an angry woman; hearing that would break my heart and I’d try to control it, but it’d seep out of me like water from an over soaked sponge…
I didn’t want to show up as that girl.
I didn’t think I was that girl.
And yet, that’s who I became…
Besides the anger, I had been having scary head pain daily with large painful pulses that felt like something was about to burst; I went to bed the last 6 months with the fear that I wouldn’t wake up. Despite eating clean and hiring trainers and joining crossfit, I continued to gain weight (people would tell me that losing weight was just harder in your thirties. I countered that I know 60 year olds that could lose weight, and yet, I could not lose a single pound, nor could I stop gaining weight although I was doing everything right to lose it).
I felt old and tired all the time, I lacked intimacy, my legs kept swelling (the doctors had me in compression tights), my joints hurt, and not only could I no longer wear the wardrobe I loved because of the weight gain, I could no longer wear heels either as my ankles felt stiff and weak.
I went from feeling strong and capable to always feeling too busy and like things were always spinning out of control.
I’d wake up in the morning and ask C if he felt more tired waking up than he did when he went to sleep (his answer was no, mine was always yes). I had anxiety and felt like I had depression (life felt flat, monotone and lacking joy) even though I continued to feel motivated towards life and our future in a non-depressed way. I’d bicker with people at work even though I was highly trained in conflict resolution and office dynamics.
Somewhere during this time my cycle flipped and I’d be irrational and emotional and feeling crazy all month long and level out during my period. C loved being around me when I was on my period; I was emotionally connected and caring and had a softness about me that I didn’t have the rest of the month. We both loved that girl who showed up those days.
I had been going to Doctors for a year and Naturopaths for the 6 months following.
I carried a list in my phone to read off to each professional I saw (just a glimpse…the list is longer than one screen shot).
The doctor’s would either test me and tell me I was “low but within normal range” or tell me there was nothing wrong.
One actually told me, ‘welcome to a woman’s normal cycle’. (Um, I just told you it was opposite of normal…)
I felt shameful as this shouldn’t be happening to a once young feeling, vibrant, and bold woman. Didn’t hormone issues just affect older women?
I felt embarrassed that people were judging my extreme weight gain as I wanted to let them know I was working my tail off and yet that doesn’t easily fit into conversation…
I’d seek help from friends stating, “I love C more than I’ve loved anyone, and yet I always seem angry with him…”
No one was listening and as I was beginning to lose my positive outlook, felt like I was complaining.
I was no longer the woman who cried with his mother at the idea of him moving so far away to be with me; I didn’t want to take him away from everyone he loved. “It’ll be good”, she replied, mentioning that love and a new career is an exciting time. And quite possibly, if things were better for me, it would have been everything we all hoped for in that moment…
C and I eventually decided for me to take a transfer, hoping he wouldn’t be far behind, as I obviously wasn’t happy and something needed to change.
We talked about living in a place that allowed us to explore hundreds of places on an average weekend and create a new and exciting normal for ourselves because I (and we) were feeling so stuck.
We chose a location where our family up north comes to visit and then we packed up my life and drove me south (that was the thing about C, he’s only ever wanted me to be happy and was willing to sacrifice whatever it took for that, including him living alone in our house and taking on the sole responsibility of selling it and officially moving us down at a later date).
But the thing about feeling disconnected when you’re with someone every day and can see them and kiss and touch them is that it’s overly amplified when there’s 1,200 kilometers between you. I figured we had done the long distance thing before so we could do it again, but I wasn’t in a disconnected fog when we were long distance before…
I was in the location we wanted and was still feeling stuck and flat and monotone and angry…C and I communicated daily although we weren’t always talking and when we would he’d feel unsupported. My family was feeling snapped at. My work sucked.
We did a large renovation to get the house ready to sell (possibly a little too much for a struggling long distance couple to do although with the best of intentions for our new life) and I freaked out at the debt of it all because acting irrationally was normal at this point and when everything feels out of control, you try to control the things you think you can…I’d speak to myself with my coach logic. It’s just money and a renovation is an investment, but that’s not how I would act…
Although I knew I was excited to see him, I wouldn’t greet him the way I used to nor be able to connect with him emotionally or intimately the way I wanted.
I cried at the drop of a hat.
I spent weekends at my mother’s feeling lazy and tired.
Although we had a ‘good Christmas’, things continued to feel flat and I greeted my family with a pasted on smile. The best gifts I’ve ever received were from C, and this Christmas was no exception, yet he felt that he didn’t do a good enough job or that I didn’t recognize his thoughtfulness. Disconnection was spilling out of me. My dear sweet Nana stated that I seemed ‘off’.
In my disconnection I questioned my love for C an energy I’m sure he felt. But what he didn’t know was that I also questioned my love for my family so I knew this was bigger than us; unfortunately, he did not and I was in a fog and unable to communicate it all. But, energy is energy, and everyone was feeling it.
I wasn’t aware just how far I’d fallen and everything that was being impacted as it’s a slow ride downhill and over time, feeling crappy just feels normal.
During the relocation, I was at my Naturopath every week to 2 weeks; she called me the model patient as anything she suggested I did 110%.
We spent thousands of dollars treating everything she suggested.
I was at massage and chiropractic weekly to help with the head pain.
I wanted to be well so desperately that I was willing to try anything, including messy hot oil packs on my abdomen for an hour every 2 days to help treat adrenal fatigue.
Slowly, there were little glimpses of hope; treating my adrenals was helping with some of the overall exhaustion and massage and chiropractic were somewhat helping my head pain.
I became unable to look at myself in the mirror; I didn’t recognize myself physically or emotionally anymore and let my image be something that was only caught by accident in my peripheral vision.
Early January, I went to my Naturopath appointment and demanded that she test my thyroid; I kept bringing it up and nothing was happening.
She replied that she didn’t think we were ‘there’ yet; I told her she was wrong and that we’ve been ‘there’ long before we met.
She ordered the testing and I was hopeful for a bit of weight loss that I couldn’t seem to find on my own and hoped that helping my body image might help other things fall into place.
One day after our breakup, I got my test results.
My Naturopath said she was glad I forced the testing as my thyroid was a ‘mess’ and on January 21, I was diagnosed as hypothyroid.
I started to treat it and even through heartache I immediately began to heal in the deepest way that I have ever experienced.
Here are photos of me (2010, Christmas 2013, 6 weeks later):
The world seemed full colour!
It was like a switch was literally turned back on in my brain.
I knew the thyroid was responsible for metabolism and I immediately saw changes in my body, but I had assumed all the emotional changes were fleeting and only due to feeling raw and hurt and a bit tuned out from my recent breakup. I was sure I’d be back to being angry and disconnected soon…
Then, a week or 2 later, I noticed one evening that my legs weren’t shaking walking down the stairs anymore and slowly started to piece together that within 2-3 days of treating my thyroid my ankles didn’t hurt upon waking, things at work were no longer making me panic, and I felt more centered and mature and calm than I had felt in a very long time even though I was completely heartbroken.
Nothing continued to make me angry or act irrationally and I wasn’t trying to control anything.
I started to observe that driving daily under a flight path, I no longer feared the planes would fall on me instead, I started to fantasize about getting on those planes and going places again.
Driving thousands of kilometers a month, I went from stressing out to enjoying the gorgeous scenery.
My desires, empathy, creativity, and love of music returned and I was no longer feeling like a shell of the person I used to be.
And the greatest gift of all?
I started laughing again; I didn’t even know it was gone!
I LOVE laughing (and actually used to be pretty funny pre-thyroid disease) and feel my soul healing with every time it escapes my lips.
I was excited to see people again, including C as he drove my belongings down.
This was certainly not the way I’d hoped to see him, but I was still excited to see him, as when all is right in the world, you’re just plain excited to see the people you love (even if the reason sucks).
I couldn’t believe it…
Could my body actually feel pain free because of kicking my thyroid back in?
Is it even possible to cure a decade of depression and anxiety through your thyroid?
It couldn’t be that even the anger that ripped my life apart is completely gone because of treating this too…
And I was shocked at what I found out:
The thyroid is not only responsible for metabolism and sex drive like I had previously thought, but is the center of your emotional wellbeing. It’s the epicenter of your life and is related to your truest expression of self; when your thyroid is off, you literally have a disconnection of self and to others.
I found physical symptoms ranging from infertility, swollen legs, thinning hair, low body temperature and dry skin, to rapid or unexplained weight gain, fatigue, slow reflexes, and body pain. Tinnitus, snoring, yawning all the time to try and get more oxygen, muscle tremors, vertigo, and recurrent sinus infections. Severe menstrual cramps, sleep disturbances, fatigue, dry eyes, significantly calloused heels, and headaches, along with dozens more.
I found emotional/mental symptoms with a list just as long: depression, anxiety, irrationality, mood swings, anger, forgetfulness, behaviours mimicking bipolar, and impaired cognitive ability. The Thyroid Association of Canada prints that, “an underactive thyroid can lead to progressive slowing of mental processes, fading of the personality’s colour and vivacity, general intellectual deterioration, (and) depression with a paranoid flavour. In instances of each condition (hypo and hyper), some persons have been wrongly diagnosed, hospitalized for months, and treated unsuccessfully for psychosis and hypothyroidism often develops insidiously over a considerable time”.
Thyroid Mind Power: The Proven Cure for Hormone-Related Depression, Anxiety, and Memory Loss
author Dr. Richard Shames has been quoted as saying: “The number of prescriptions for thyroid medicines now exceeds that for almost any other category of illness and the chance that you might have a thyroid issue is well worth considering, even if you have normal tests… An astonishing 1 in 10 North Americans of all age ranges has some degree of thyroid imbalance and even a mild imbalance can cause severe symptoms.”
The Thyroid Solution: A Revolutionary Mind-Body Program for Regaining Your Emotional and Physical Health author Dr. Ridha Arem says, “Scientists now consider thyroid hormones one of the major players in brain chemistry disorders. And as with any brain chemical disorder, until treated correctly, thyroid hormone imbalance has serious effects on the patient’s emotions and behavior.”
Out of the 25 million people with Hypothyroidism, less than 10% know about it…
Thyroid issues are becoming more and more common today and everyone from young children to the elderly are being diagnosed. Whether it be today’s stressful life, birth control, flouride, pesticides, food or hundreds more triggers, the thyroid is sensitive and can wreak havoc on your emotional and physical life.
For me, I’ve always lost an insane amount of hair and every hairdresser I’ve had mentions my thyroid and I had my first test before I was 18.
I was first diagnosed with depression and then anxiety (depression with a paranoid flavor) at 21 and spent the next 10 years on and off anti-depression/anxiety medication which never seemed to help.
Last year, I had a psychiatrist I was seeing as part of a panic program continue to try to prescribe me medication citing that I must have never been on a high enough dose if it wasn’t helping.
I had my last Doctor issued thyroid test a year ago which came back again ‘low but within normal range’. Current ranges for thyroid health are very broad and I would have been diagnosed years ago using the Naturopathic ranges.
My tests were not low enough to catch a Doctor’s eye and yet my symptoms were severe and took a huge toll on my life and relationship and I have learned that you can ONLY have your best life when you’re physically and emotionally able to show up in wellness.
To be living in such a tuned out state and resurface into clarity just as my relationship is crumbling at my feet has been the most difficult journey of my life. Because of the mental fog, I have little memories of being unable to connect over the past few months and now that I feel fully conscious, have tons of mental availability and space, and life feels 100% easier, the person I want to connect with most is gone and a large void has been left in its place.
I continue to be in shock at the toll that this has taken on my life, but as a Coach, I will (not always gracefully)
sit in the space of trust that,
although I feel that I’ve lost my everything,
I will find a powerful way through this and heal deeply by being as healthy as I can be.
And quite possibly, healthier than I’ve been in over 10 years…
About Robyn Guidon
Robyn Guidon is a 4 time certified coach and founder of She Went Out on a Limb, an online resource created to help women unleash their best lives.
*Through multiple levels of healing from both parties, Robyn and C have mended their relationship (with an extra emphasis on health and awareness that’s been learned along the way).
READ NEXT: Hypothyroidism. An Open Letter to My Family
Hi, thank you so much for this post, really adds clarity to what I’d consider probably the most challenging years of my life. I’d lived with Hypothyroidism for over a decade, and am sure it was an early onset at the beginning of High School. I used to drink a LOT of milk when I was a kid, and am pretty sure all those hormones in there messed me up!. I now know what I have is Hashimoto’s. I basically lived my teenage years and all 20s with a messed up Thyroid. While everybody was super energetic and with raging hormones I was always the one to sit in the back never raise my hand, and forget about it if the girls approached me it was always embarrassing. I moved to the US from Mexico at the age of 10 and I think not too long from then is when my thyroid started under-performing. It made a already tough transition way tougher. The feeling is just as you described it, you can’t really get a good grasp of who you are and where you stand in life and with others. I always was the one to try and make good company for everyone, because if everyone was comfortable and having a good time so was I. As a matter of fact I still remember when I was a kid I would get up every morning like 8am and be out on the street the whole day and not feel tired at all, but do it all again the next day, boundless energy, drive, confidence and motivation. Not to brag but I was a pretty popular kid haha. Anyway the years with untreated Thyroid were bland and I always felt like I couldn’t put my finger on things. It was hard to figure out things when I didn’t know what I wanted because my desires and passions were not there. Anytime I was asked about something, it was the same response sure, ok. This also caused a lot of problems in my relationships because I could never meet my ex-girlfriends emotionally, I was just bland and I hated it. Sometimes I’d think up a joke(would have to think it up because a lot of times they did not come on the spot) I would share it and people would laugh but would stop when they didn’t see me laughing, because even though I knew it was funny, I was bland about it. I always put myself down for all the things I did wrong/failed to do as am naturally hard on myself/perfectionist. I was depressed and did not know it. People always thought I was just like that. Am now taking Levothyroxine since my 30s basically a year ago as I am now about to turn 31. It’s like a brand new life, and its funny because one of the things I said was I can feel the colors now haha. People now very often look at me strangely(including surprising even myself), when it comes to taking initiative in things and doing it well and with confidence. I have not been a relationship since then but I am most definitely looking forward to it. My optimism and confidence is there, and I love to face my challenges head on. I am thankful, that even though I feel it more now, I know the Lord was with me the whole time and kept me from making harm to myself when things got bad. I am gonna keep my TSH levels as low as I can, where I feel comfortable with everything I want to get done. Once again thank you for sharing, am sorry you had to go through that, I sometimes ask myself why that was necessary, but life happens, good and bad. Thank you Lord.
I am crying reading this. I have felt the same way for many years. I never knew that it could be my thyroid. I have a Dr. Appointment today and I’m going to ask if they will check mine. I hope that I get the results I need and that if it is thyroid a weight will be lifted as I’ve felt as if my anxiety and depression is my fault for the past 10 years.
This made me cry, such a mirror image of my life the past year. Feeling crazy, pushing away the love of my life, feeling angry all the time. I found out that it was my thyroid in June, it’s been a struggle ..some days are still up and down.. but the hardest thing is knowing I pushed away my love because I felt out of control and questioned all my feelings. it’s amazing how many women lived with this same health problem and so many people think it’s all in your head, because a doctor doesn’t take it seriously..
It has been amazing reading all of these testimonies! I met the love of my life 8 months ago. A Christian single mom and nurse suffering from Hashimoto’s. She has many if not all of same symptoms many of you have spoken of.
the last month has been rough, she went from wanting to get married and in love to not sure, doesnt know, doesnt know why she doesnt know, I annoy her though she doesnt know why. Then were good, then were not. Its a nightmare! She said something to me that hurt my feelings deeply, though I know she didnt mean to. I responded in a very upset way and left. Brought her flowers and lunch to work told her I was sorry for being so upset, that it wasn’t her fault, that I was here for her and everything would be ok, we would be fine. She told me that stressed her out. I love her so much but today when I showed up to mass to tell her about my decision to be baptized and to pray and speak with her she totally lost it on me. Told me she didnt want to have anything to do with me. All of this seemed to happen overnight. I told her how I felt in a text and said I would respect her wishes though I hope she calls me so we can figure this out. Any advice and prayers would be greatly appreciated. Good luck to everyone and God bless!
A woman I was dating had anxiety and what I suspected to be was depression. I thought everything was going good and then September 2019 she was told she might have hypothyroidism. After further testing she was told she had hashimoto’s. Fast forward to October 2019 towards the end of the month she told me she couldn’t do it anymore. She felt safer alone and doing nothing but wanting to work and sleep. She spends time with family but our coworkers had started commenting how she was snapping at people and having mood swings. I asked her and she says her mental health is fine and that I make her mad and irritate her and the past 4 weeks we haven’t spoken hardly at all. Some of our friends tell me to give up and move on because she is fine since she smiles but how do you just move on when it could possibly be part of the hashimoto’s.
I experienced the same thing in my recent relationship. We’ve know each other during medical school and we hit it off really well. Towards the end of the class I asked her if she wanted to get in a relationship she said she was really depressed and couldn’t be in a relationship (this is when symptoms started). Fast forward a few months later I reached out to her and with great surprise she agreed to meet me and we started talking and began a relationship. Everything was going great. We had great chemistry and things were going really well, we both enjoyed each other and there was nothing but love and respect for each other. I noticed that she was experiencing a lot of these symptoms as stated in the article, tired, cold, yawing a lot, joint pain and a little weight gain but I didn’t mention anything. I love her for who she is her heart not the way she looks. She started her new program to continue her medical career and she was struggling (having a hard time focusing and retaining info) but I keep being motivational and being positive towards everything. Then she received a call from the doctors saying that the results confirmed that she was diagnosed with hashimotos. This is when things started to change. She was still talking to me and we hung out whenever she had the time. And I made effort to remain patient and positive. She told me she appreciates how I hung on thru the time, distance and medical condition. A few weeks pass and school started to get harder and she is on the boarder line of failing. So I allowed her time and space to focus on school. We didn’t talk for a week and when I reached out to see how she was doing I didn’t get a reply. A few days later still no reply so I texted her again and she said there’s a lot going on and that she’s sorry for neglecting me. I kept it positive saying I understand and not to worry. I understand that her life goals and career is the very top priority along with her immediate family. And I fall at the bottom. So a few weeks go by and I reach out to check in and nothing. A few weeks later still nothing so I made the mistake in calling her multiple times. She replied saying that she is moving out of her dads and that there’s a lot going on there. And she will call me when she was done. I didn’t get a call but I got a text saying that she moved out of her dads and is with her mom. There was way too much happening there. She said that she jumped into things way to quick and it best that we remain friends. There was just way too much happening. I was really upset and hurt and said if I accepted to being just a friend I would be lying to myself and to her. I can’t just see you as a just a friend. I love her. I told her to reach out to me if she changes her mind and when things have settled down. I gave her a motivational message and told her there’s a lot I’m going to miss about you and to take care. She replied I’m sorry. It’s been about a month since I heard from her and i don’t know what to do. I want to reach out to her and see how’s she doing but afraid that I would be bothering her and drive her father away from me. If there’s any advice I can get it would be greatly appreciated. I wish I came across this article sooner, it would have helped me realize what was really going I thought she was just being avoidant towards me. And didn’t want to continue things. Now I know what was happening and I’m full of regrets and sadness.
Hello, I was diagnosed as hypothyroid last October with a test of 9.78umol. I switched doctors and they have me on synthroid but only a very small dose of 50mg. I am still feeling detached and moody just like what you described. I was wondering what medication and what amount you took to feel better? It’s been 5 months since I started and I still feel terrible. I’m beginning to lose hope of ever feeling like myself again and I only just turned 30.
Hi. I am surviving hypothyroidism. My T-count was 25. I have been informed by my wife that I have been a dick for 10 years. It doesn’t help that I was once a wrestler. The imbalance the thyroid gave me fed and angry aggressive nature and I was often mean to her. It didn’t seem that way to me. Her claim is that I been abusive. At the center of my heart is the kind of person who wants a loving successful marriage, children, and happiness. I get the position women are in and have the up most respect for their suffering. I set examples every chance I get to help women get even footing in the world. I don’t see myself as an abuser. I began a hormone called synthroid. It has chased the “demon” away. I kind of have returned to a normal being. There’s still a lot of repair that needs done with my wife. We are in counseling. Some days I think it’s good and other days I just don’t know. I thought my story might help. I feel like my life as been robbed from me and I have been labeled and am uncertain of my future. It’s a real thing. It’s heart wrenching and soul stealing. I wish you all a successful journey.
Thanks and you too… I myself can relate
Hi. I am surviving hypothyroidism. My T-count was 25. I have been informed by my wife that I have been a dick for 10 years. It doesn’t help that I was once a wrestler. The imbalance the thyroid gave me fed and angry aggressive nature and I was often mean to her. It didn’t seem that way to me. Her claim is that I been abusive. At the center of my heart is the kind of person who wants a living successful marriage, children, and happiness. I get the position women are in and gave the up most respect for their suffering. I set examples every chance I get to help women get even footing in the world. I don’t see myself as an abuser. I began a hormone called synthroid. It has chased the “demon” away. I kind of have returned to a normal being. There’s still a lot of repair that needs done with my wife. We are in counseling. Some days I think it’s good and other days I just don’t know. I thought my story might help. I feel like my life as been robbed from me and I have been labeled and am uncertain if my future. It’s a real thing. It’s heart wrenching and soul stealing. I wish you all a successful journey.
Hey it’s crazy I’ve been dealing with these issues our whole relationship. My girlfriend stop taking her meds about 8months ago. In that time frame she’s been moody and angry saying hurtful things and then 2months ago she’s needs a break. So we have been broken up for 2 months. She’s was so angry at me she’s block me just push me out of her life. She would say leave her alone then call me we will have a good conversation about moving forward then the next day she flipp and now we don’t even speak.
I am dating a girl who has been recently diagnosed. Your story reminds me of ours. We have been so in love and almost like a fairytale up until the past few weeks. All of a sudden she is very withdrawn from me and says that she doesn’t have feelings of love towards me the same anymore. This came out of nowhere. She doesn’t understand what is happening. Her doctor appears to have changed her medicine and all of this has started happening. I sent her this article. I hope she finds help as you did that is effective. Our days have been pretty rough lately and I dont know how to handle this new version of her. I love her and hope we find answers.
Hi Zach, It is wonderful that you are doing research on thyroid disease for your girlfriend. This disease can affect your entire body and even change the way you interact with people you love. Imagine having a disease that completely exhausts you that you don’t even recognize yourself. I hope your girlfriend will come and visit Hypothyroid Mom. There is hope to be well.
I appreciate this post and story very much. One thing to which people are not paying close enough attention is their exposure to wireless technology. RF exposure is a prime culprit in low thyroid function. Smart phone literature (which comes with the phone) all contains language which says that an operating phone ought not be used against the body. Wifi is even more damaging to the body and thyroid. Hypothyroidism is a horrible thing but people should be avoiding wireless exposure just as they would chemicals which are anti-thyroid.
I am certain you are right about wireless technology. I think about this a great deal and this is a good reminder to include more articles about this topic at Hypothyroid Mom.
I appreciate this post and story very much. One thing to which people are not paying close enough attention is their exposure to wireless technology. RF exposure is a prime culprit in low thyroid function. Smart phone literature (which comes with the phone) all contains language which says that an operating phone ought not be used against the body. Wifi is even more damaging to the body and thyroid. Hypothyroidism is a horrible thing but people should be avoiding wireless exposure just as they would chemicals which are anti-thyrioud.
“Somewhere during this time my cycle flipped and I’d be irrational and emotional and feeling crazy all month long and level out during my period. C loved being around me when I was on my period; I was emotionally connected and caring and had a softness about me that I didn’t have the rest of the month. We both loved that girl who showed up those days.”
This is my exact problem and I never see anyone talking about this! I feel the best on day 1 of my period when I’m bleeding heavily. Some months there’s little change, but other months I have more energy, feel calmer/more emotional (I’m usually completely numb, I have DP/DR)/etc when I’m on my period. Is there a way that I can contact you? Would love to talk about this…I’ve been on thyroid meds before and they made me feel worse (and I did try natural thyroid), but that was years ago so maybe I’ll look into trying it again…idk. Psych meds make me feel a million times worse.
Where to begin? Me and my partner were together for several years. Like any relationship we had our ups and downs but found a way to come together in a number of situations and be a team. Some of the root problems were others (Her Family) trying to be involved in our relationship. She began to get sick out of no where. It was classified as CVS (Cyclic vomiting syndrome) and we powered through it, but it took a major toll on the relationship. She was afraid to travel as we were even removed off a plane 1 time. We were consistently going to the hospital tons of tests with no answers. Then other things started to happen. Bowel issues. Anxiety. Depression. extreme Fatigue. Then the night sweats. The horrible night sweats. She would get up at least 2 times a night to change if not more. At one point, I started sleeping on the couch to not have an extra 100 degrees next to her and wake up covered in sweat.
She stayed at home, I make enough money that she didn’t need to work and she would go about her day waking up at noon, taking a nap at 4pm and then sometimes another before going to bed at roughly 1am. We were both avid gamers so I thought it was typical. We were “night people”. Then she began to gain weight out of no where. a size 3 to 12 in less then 6 months. The mood swings got even worse. We then went to a new Dr. and she was tested for her Thyroid and was diagnosised with Hypothyroidism. We though we finally found the answer. She literally had every symptom across the board it made complete sense and we started to figure out treats with the Dr.
From there she started to seclude herself even more, spending hours alone in the bedroom, watching movies, playing games, but not with the people we have known for years. In Feb. 2018, in the morning I got up and she was upset, something had happened and she was crying and when I said whats wrong she blunted out “I’m done” and I said, “Yeah me too, this is crazy” and she said “No! I’m done with this relationship” I was shocked, but I said if this is what you want, then we will work through it and we will figure out a way to make the transition. It’s not something I wanted, but I respected the decision. a few weeks later, we sat and talked and she said she wanted to try to work things out (she was not big on talking) weeks past, she never packed a thing, things seemed to be getting better and she was taking her new meds. We had talked about moving away, and when it was brought up in a conversation in March she turned and looked at me and said “What did you not understand when I said the relationship was over?” I was beside myself, I thought we were trying, I thought it was going to be ok. I spoke with the Dr. and she said this is to be expected, the ups and downs but don’t give up. So I sat and told her.. “I know this isn’t you.. it’s this and we are going to make it through this! that I loved her and we are going to beat this!” held her hand and she agreed.
I come to find out that during that time she started a relationship (With the help of her mother) with someone from her past and had slept with him. I came home from another trip and found out she had saw him that weekend and spent time with him. She tried to convince me I was paranoid for 40 mins until finally saying it happened. We separated and she is at her mothers house, no job, sleeping on a couch and in a truly negative environment where she is being told that the reason she was sick was because of me.
I truly love this person with all my heart, even looking past the betrayal of what happened I was ready willing and able to give her all the support and love she needed. I fear for her with not taking proper care of herself and have even tried to speak with her mother on it and get her medication to her. She wants zero contact with me now, we do not speak. She is angry at me for some reason and I am heart broken. I love this person, sickness or not and was more the ready to battle anything that came our way health wise. I feel a piece of me is missing. This illness was a major part of ruining our lives.
I’m so sorry you have gone through this, love is hard. I to feel my relationship ended because of his thyroid problems and all the symptoms that come with it. It’s such a terrible condition to have. He was only diagnosed in the last 2years and put on to medication. However his symptoms just got worse fatigue, night sweats, concentration, memory, mood swings, shortness of breath, aggression to name a few. He got very depressed after the diagnosis he had always been a health strong man but this condition took it out of him. He would tell me he was happy with me but not his life, on top was covid the stress got to him terribly. I became his outlet for his anger and nothing I said or did was right, it was many hurtful comments over the time and I soon learned not to bring them up as he didn’t want to know or would look at me like when will you finish talking. I felt like I was walking on egg shells not asking him to do things as he was fatigued not having 2way conversations because he wasn’t concentrating well. He would tell me how much he loved me it was his illness so I believed him, I’ve has health issues myself so I know the toll it can take. Long story short he had to go away for a few days had so much fun away from his life that he decided to leave me for someone there. Sadly I believe his health issues will go with him and all the symptoms but I do hope he will get help to fix all the other symptoms and have the life he wants with improved health. I just wish his behaviour had not been so out of character.
Wow to say the least… I went looking for something to explain myself for so long. So explain what I was going thru and to get my bf to understand. That who I was and what I was going thru wasn’t me. It felt like someone else was living my life for me in a way to explain it. I know in My worst I was someone else. I bow call that person my alter ego. I don’t recognize myself in past videos or some pics are very like weird. I seemed like a self centered selfish female dog word. So your story sounds pretty similar to what I went thru pretty dang close. Him and I are still together for now. For the future idk. I don’t think he likes me very much anymore because of the past. It’s the week of and my moods off once again. So putting him thru slight hell not on purpose. It’s just idk something something hits me and I get picky or questionable to him. I don’t trust I accuse or I reply harshly. This crap sucks. So it’s ruined me, my relationship one time. We got back together because he never gave up. Here we r now and sometimes I think he would be better without me and this drama crap.. me and this dilemma. I mean just because I suffer why should he. Sometimes I think he would be better off. I feel like I’m exhausting him and it’s not intentional at all. It doesn’t help along the way my sister died and everything was even worse.
I recently found out I have hypothyroidism and I’m so glad I finally found the root to my problem. I thought I was supposed to live the rest of my life this way. I am 19 years old and seriously thought that the extreme tiredness I was feeling was just simply a part of life. I also thought that the inability to concentrate just meant I needed more than the 8hrs of sleep I was getting. I knew it was time to get a check up after sleeping 10hrs and yawning several times the next morning. My mood has affected so many people in my life that now I feel very guilty. I was mean to many people and I really regret it. I also was so exhausted to the point where I stopped hanging out with friends and told asked myself “Where do they get all this energy from?”. I also had moments where I felt so upset with myself and thought I was not worth it. I felt like I just wasn’t good enough.
Hi there! In your article you stated “I started to treat it and even through heartache I immediately began to heal in the deepest way that I have ever experienced”
Could you please talk to us or direct us to one of your site’s pages where you elaborate more on the type of treatment that you began and made you recover your health back.
Thanks so much in advance to anyone that can help me with a little knowledge. I am not sure how to approach this health issue because my PCP doesn’t have any suggestions besides sinthetic hormones. Is this the only thing you did?
Please remove my letter above…I did not know that it would appear instantly on the web.
Thank-you
I came down with hypothyroidism 2 and 1/2 yr ago. All the same symptoms. People laughed at me and joked that I have been overeating. I cried so much. I wasn’t overeating. I wandered into a yoga class by accident five months ago. I have been going to two classes a week. I have lost ten pounds.i have toned up. You don’t sweat with yoga. I also do yoga at home. Legs up the wall and fish pose are good for the thyroid. So is shoulder stand. Google search Yoga poses for thyroid. I thank God I found yoga.im still tired and irritable but at least I look like I did before hypothyroidism. My yoga teacher insists that over time thyroid levels can go back to normal after years of yoga practice. If you are hypothyroid you have nothing to lose by trying a beginner yoga class
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I’m so happy I found your story. I identify with what you wrote. I have the mood swings, tired, I feel numb inside etc. This is also affecting my loves ones because I am mean. I try to control but at the moment of anger I don’t care what I say or who I hurt. I have been struggling with this disease for about 7 years. At first I didn’t know what it was until my thyroid grew a goiter when I became pregnant with my first child. My labs were like yours low normal range. I went in for thyroid surgery to my left thyroid lobe on June 8th, 2016. They found follicular cancer. I had to go back into surgery on Sept.9th, 2016, and now I am waiting on radio active iodine treatment. My husband tries to understand my situation but it is hard for him to be snapped at everyday. I do hope that after my treatment I can continue start my thyroid medicine and start feeling human again. I want to feel the connection you said you felt. I want to laugh, I want LIVE again.
Thank you for the hope of finding the old loving, caring me.
Amen girl. I really want to feel ALIVE.
Hi, I have hashimotos disease, diagnosed at 23yrs. I’m now 52. I have been on thyroxine all this time. I have always had blood tests and the gp says I’m fine. But I’m always tired, lack of energy, often have insomnia, I yawn all the time, I feel horrible in the morning etc. my gp put me on antidepressants which aren’t working, I’m still sad and low in mood and I cry so easily. I don’t know what to do?